Comparison kills

I always listen for Gods direction when thinking about what to write about next. I was listening to an interview on television and the person being interviewed made an insightful statement. She was asked how she is getting through the pandemic and her response was something someone told her. “This pandemic has purpose”. Amen! I agreed whole heartedly because no matter how we view it, we were all going so fast that we were disconnected from who and what is most important to our lives. We thought we were doing what it took to get ahead, to measure up, we were over scheduled and down right tired. Now in many cases, we are looking for something to do other than the kids, the house, and cooking etc.

So don’t listen to the voices, the posts, the haters that say “You didn’t do anything with this time, other people did….” Don’t fall for the hype.

If you rested and feel refreshed, if you renewed your spiritual life, if you read your Bible and prayed more, if you ate dinner together as a family, if you sat quietly with your spouse for the first time in a long time and had quality conversations, if you played with your children and listened to what was on their minds, then my dear hearts, you have done well.

We must stop comparing ourselves to others, that’s what got us running tirelessly to and fro in order to “measure up” to others. Why???? Comparison kills! It kills the authentic you, it kills your joy and it robs you of your energy.

God made you individual and specific for the life He meant for you to live.

Psalm 139:13-14 For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope

Psalm 139:13-14

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”

What have I missed

I was listening to the radio as I do most days and heard an individual talking about spending time with his grandchildren. He said he took them to the playground and realized he left his cell phone home, in a moment of panic he thought “I’m out of touch with everyone”, on second thought he said, “we used to be okay with being out of touch and it was okay because it was normal”.

Note for the first time, he was totally present with his grandchildren, he listened to their every comment, their every giggle and their calls, “Watch this Papa, Did you see that Papa”. They wanted to show him all their little tricks and see him smile and say “That was great” or “Be careful now”. He immediately got sad because he knew how quickly this time would pass, and who knows how many beautiful memories he had actually missed out on while paying more attention to his cell phone in the past, only glancing up here and there. In that moment he vowed to never let that happen again. He would give his full attention and be present in whatever he was doing.

The problem was not the device, it was that he allowed that little thing to take priority over most everything.

We search everything, we use them in place of conversations we used to have with others. They seem to be a best friend to some and to others their everything! I must admit it was one of my fears for young people when they first came out, as I observed them texting everything instead of having real conversations. They used them in settings to not feel obligated to engage or be a part of what was going on. Now adults are doing the same thing, just pay attention the next time you’re in a waiting room or in line for something.

Let’s make a decision to be present, to engage others, time is fleeting as I have come to realize especially since Covid 19 struck our country. Days seem to run together, it’s the end of the week again before I know it and almost the end of 2020. Worst for me is I haven’t seen my own grandchildren since the first of the year. They are military families in Florida. I really miss just watching them play in my yard full of joy, care free and just being kids at “Nanny and Papa’s house”.

I believe there’s a lesson for us all in this pandemic. We don’t need so much stuff, so much activity, so much anything. We need people and personal interaction. We had too much “STUFF” going on, we had to much stuff period! I know because I got rid of a lot of it in the beginning of the pandemic when there was nothing else to do but clean out closets.

Let’s pray for a total mind and heart RESET, pray for our country to return to a simpler time. Let’s appreciate one another more because so many of us have lost loved ones to this terrible virus and probably missed out on a lot with loved ones because we were absorbed in our own lives and those dang phones!

Remember to live for today, tomorrow is not promised.

James 4:13

Chili Recipe

Soooo good. I used a chili pack (2tbsp) instead of chili powder. I used 1 1/2 Tbsps cumin instead of two. I did not use any pepper and chicken broth instead of beef because I didn’t have beef. Oh and black beans instead of kidney. It was amazing!!!

A Prayer for Our Husbands Now and to Come

This is a prayer by a young lady I mentor, she wrote this prayer to God for the husband she is asking Him for, the One who is just for her. I think it is a prayer for all wives to pray for their husbands.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I come to you in Your mighty name, to plead Your blood over my husband. Father God, I pray that he keeps you in the center of his heart and as his first love. I pray that he walks worthy of the calling with which he was called, with all lowliness, gentleness and longsuffering. I pray that You would bless his hard work in Your kingdom and make him successful in all that he does according to Your will. Be his refuge and strength as he leans on You in his trials. Guide him by his honesty and help him not to be overtaken by his temptations. I pray that he would have a giving heart and not lack. Bless him with discernment in handling our finances as he stays devoted to You Lord. Bring to his remembrance the thoughts that You think towards him, thoughts of peace and not evil, to give him a future and a hope. Give him the strength to pray without ceasing when he lacks wisdom. I pray dear Lord, that my husband’s love may abound in knowledge and all discernment. And that he may approve the things that are excellent, that he may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ’s return.

Teach my husband to love me, just as You loved the church and gave Yourself for us. Help me to submit and surrender to my husband as he submits and surrenders all things to You. I ask You to be the driving force in our marriage. Let all things work together for good as he fully grasps his purpose in You. I pray that he is not dominated by food or anything that is unprofitable to his health. When he is weak and tired Lord be his strength and shield and help him as his heart trusts in You. I will sing praises as his heart greatly rejoices. Surround him with wise men who will bring him up as he walks boldly declaring the Truth of the Gospel, preaching the kingdom of God and teaching the things which concern You with all confidence. I pray that he grows spiritually in Your grace and knowledge through reading, studying and praying Your word. I pray that he will have a humble, teachable spirit full of patience, peace and quick to forgive. May he guard his heart with all diligence as he obey Your laws and follow Your teachings.

Lastly Lord, I pray that he would continue to lead our family in Your will and that You would be glorified in and through our marriage! In Your mighty name I pray,

Amen!

What’s Happened To Us?

In this time of Covid 19, I’ve heard more than once that divorce is on the rise, families are having trouble functioning in close quarters. It’s hard on some of us for a lot of different reasons but ask yourself these questions;

When is the last time I spoke lovingly or endearing words to my spouse, to my child, to my family, even to a friend. Do they feel loved by me, do they feel as if I care about them, do I love them but maybe I don’t like them, and is it their fault or mine?

Not that it matters much who’s fault it is but most importantly, Is there anything you can do to change this?

YES! Absolutely!

There is nothing impossible for God, We can do all things with Christ who strengthens you, Philippians 4:13. Our God is able to do anything but fail us. The beginning of restoration (healing) is to admit there is a problem, separation, sadness, brokenness etc,. So if you constantly find your life in turmoil (dysfunction) and you are continually unhappy, it’s an attack of the spiritual kind.

The Bible tells us that our battles are not against one another (flesh and blood), they are spiritual battles, Ephesians 6:12, we must commit to praying those spirits out of our families, our relationships. I say this because scripture says “The thief (devil) comes only to steal, kill and destroy” John 10:10.

The Bible also tells us to “Cast our cares on Him (God) because He cares for us” 1Peter 5:7. He wants us to depend on Him (just as we would our earthly father) He is well able to change our circumstances, we need only ask (invite Him in) His help.

Lastly, Commit to prayer “PUSH”, Pray Until Something Happens! “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not yet scene” Hebrews 11:1, so If it’s your spouse, your child, a co-worker, a family member no matter who it is, call their name in prayer. Speak correlating scriptures into that prayer and situation and trust that a change is in the works on your behalf because God promises us “if we abide in Him and His word abides (lives) in us, we can ask what ever we desire (love and obedience to His Word) and we shall have it” John 15:7

Get creative, do activities, go for rides, Go for walks, clean the house, don’t let thing gets too messy because that affects your mood as well, do anything different just be safe while you’re doing it.

Set your heart on God, learn His word, be humble and obedient and watch how things change. Danial 10

Comparison Kills

I always listen for Gods direction while thinking about what to write about next.

I was listening to an interview on television this morning. The person being interviewed made an insightful statement. She was asked how she is getting through the pandemic, her response was something someone told her. “This pandemic has purpose”.

Amen! I agreed whole heartedly because no matter how we view it, we were all going so fast that we were disconnected from who and what is most important in our lives. We thought we were doing what it took to get ahead, to measure up instead we were over scheduled and down right tired.

So don’t listen to the voices, the posts, the haters that say “You didn’t do anything with this time, other people did….” blah blah blah.

Don’t fall for the hype.

If you rested and feel refreshed finally, if you renewed your spiritual life, if you read your Bible and prayed more, if you ate dinner together as a family, if you sat quietly with your spouse for the first time in a long time and had quality conversations, if you played with your kids and listened to what was on their minds, then my dear hearts, you have done well.

We must stop comparing ourselves to others, that’s what got us running tirelessly to and fro in order to measure up to others. Why???? Comparison kills! It kills the authentic you, it kills your joy and it robs you of energy. God made you individual and specific for the life He meant for you to live.

Jeremiah 29
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope

Refuse to listen to negativity and Stop trying to measure up to anyone’s standards other than The Lords.

Psalm 139:13-14
For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”

Seasons Come and Seasons Go

There’s nothing like Spring time. The earth comes alive, the same is true for new love. Remember when you met your spouse, how attracted you were to them and how you talked all the time. You didn’t want to offend them for anything, now your like “ Whatever, they’ll get over it” with attitude at that.

The first years of marriage are like Summer time, everything is fresh, warm and cuddly “Wedded bliss”. You hoped your entire marriage would be just like that but wish as you may, it just didn’t continue that way because we change, life changes us and there’s nothing we can do about it! Children, jobs, mortgages and all the other responsibilities of life come along and we wonder “What the heck happened”. That’s the Fall season of our relationship and left to its own devices we’ll become down right cold towards one another! That’s the Winter season. We start to ask questions like “What happened to us, Why don’t you …. anymore, do you love me, do you care about how hard I’m working” to take care of you“

Here’s what happened, when you got together there weren’t many distractions, you wanted to be together every waking moment and you wanted to please each other. No one came before your “Boo”.

We decide what and who our priorities are. We allow life, children, careers etc. to get in the way of the most important physical relationship you will probably have. Everyone doesn’t get to experience marriage but you’ve gotten to and it’s vitally important to keep nurturing your relationship with your spouse. It’s as easy as changing one thing a day, JUST “1” THING! If you know your husband needs affirmation, (compliments) just give him one. He may look at you side eyed but keep doing it. If you know your wife is working hard to look good for you, to keep the house in order and caring for your children, help her out a little. Do the dishes every now and then or order take out so she doesn’t have to cook so much.

Seasons, as tough as they can be are necessary for our growth both mentally and spiritually. We must simply learn to be flexible, bend with the heat, shrink back when it’s necessary, and speak up when you feel overwhelmed.

The easiest way to change anything about your life a little at a time is to start by changing just one thing a day. I promise it works! I’ve done it.

In the same way we have the ability to change our worldly relationships, we can grow our spiritual relationship with our Heavenly Father by starting with just one thing a day. If “I don’t have time” is your regular response to spiritual growth, try this, the minute you open your eyes (after you shake out the cobwebs) just thank God, invite Him into your day, ask Him to lead and to guide you as you go about your day, going to and from your destinations and if you forget, simply ask the Lord to remind you, He will (don’t ignore Him). For just as your spouse loves one on one time with you, Your Heavenly Father desire’s quiet time with you as well.

Lord help us to remember who we fell in love with, help us to l see with the same love you show to us, patient, forgiving and merciful everyday.

Lamentations 3:22-23

Be blessed

Cherish The Love We Have

Apparently a great number of parents are taking out their frustrations on their children during these very stressful times. Social services in Atlanta has reported a need for temporary placements to avoid abuse!

Sheltering in place has forced us to be together with our families, but because of the lives we have made so busy, being together something many families are not used to doing.

Although I can understand the stress of losing a job, not having enough food, and bills coming due; I cannot understand taking it out on innocent children! Children love us unconditionally and besides they too have their own set of concerns and anxieties about not being in school, not seeing their friends, and the lack of having a normal life since this pandemic “thing” changed their lives too..

I believe one of the best things that can come out of this pandemic (if we keep things in prospective) is the renewal of family and the understanding that we were doing way too much “stuff” instead of appreciating and spending time with our families. Children are a special gift from God and in the grand scheme of things, they are ours for a very short time. It is our responsibility in that time to mold them into great human beings and to teach them to be examples of Gods love to the world.

Love them today, for tomorrow is not promised!

Our spouses also need to know we love them the way we did before children and the responsibilities of life took our lives over. Let us view to renew family bonds and restore our fragmented lives. Let us understand that when this is all over some of us will be missing a loved one. Do not be one who has to ask yourself, “Did I show them I appreciated them, did they know that they were important to me, did they know that I loved them above everything else?”

Let’s live life like there’s no tomorrow. Live on purpose, love harder, laugh more.

NO REGRETS!

What you feed Grows

In the last few years, I have noticed an upward trend in entertainment and more recently immorality has exploded.  It has to do with the changing of television ratings and censorship as well as television programming content.  The words “God damn” doesn’t get bleeped out but most all other profanity does!  Anything seems to be permissible while we “Christians”, in my opinion, are mostly the cause for the explosion.

We have sat back quietly, blissfully, and ignorantly allowed television and movie content to change from mostly family friendly to disturbingly ungodly and unwholesome in the name of “entertainment”. We secretly sit behind closed doors watching that in which we would have been ashamed to admit out loud to anyone years ago. Now we openly discuss these shows with one another because “things have changed so much” or have they? Things have changed because people have changed, “Christians” have changed, which has caused the world to change!

If you do not know how entertainment works, it’s our viewership and our listenership which puts money in the pockets of shows, actors/actresses, and production companies.  That is what dictates what type of shows will continue to be produced, what language is acceptable, and what content we will watch.  All while we “Christians” sit back shaking our heads in disgust, wondering “what is this world coming to”? It is coming to what we have shown approval for  by silently and secretly sitting in front of a television set viewing un-Godly content.

Here is how we can change it. Many  Christians believe that the Covid-19 virus and its effects (self quarantine) are meant to be a time for cleansing and renewal in the world. If this is so, one thing we must stop is being selfish, self centered, and sneaky in the way we are allowing ourselves to be entertained.  We must stop making excuses for what we do and why it should be okay because “times have changed “.  Times have not changed, we have!

When ratings go down, shows are canceled.  You are a rating when you watch.  That is how networks and production companies look at what people are watching. If we go back to wholesome entertainment, the production companies will definitely take note and make more wholesome, family friendly television and stop pushing the immorality envelope.

Have you noticed that new shows start out great? They suck us in with a wonderful story line “hook line and sinker”  then, when they think they’ve got us, here comes bad language, homosexual relationships, and explicit sex scenes. Why do you think that is?  They’ve got us now.  We say “ I have to know what happens next”! Is it that good to you?  We must turn away, and stop watching, if things are going to get better.  Your viewership counts and even more than that, we will answer to God for what we have allowed in our lives, in our homes, and especially in our spirits.

What we feed will grow in our spirits even if you don’t believe it.  Just pay attention to what you prioritize, what you accept, even your language.

This is our time to help grow the kingdom of God choosing His will over our own selfish desires in the name of being entertained.

2 Chronicles 7:14

If my people which are called by My name will humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven, I will forgive their sins and I will heal their land.

No Do Overs

As always when I talk to my best friend something comes out of our conversation which helps us both. We always seem to lift one another up that way. This time it was our roles as “Help meets” to our husbands and children and how we sometimes resist that calling because we are just tired. We either do too much for our families (spoil them) or we take on too much outside our households which causes imbalance.

In most cases God did not call us to those “other things” but He did call us to be wives, mothers, and nurturers. It’s not always easy, and yes we do allow life to overwhelm us with things which do not matter as much as our families.

I recently heard a report which said that most young mothers are so overwhelmed with motherhood, they have turned to drinking and taking drugs as a way to cope!

I attribute that to trying to have “It All”, careers, social lives, as well as the pressure that is “Social media perfection”. We all should know from our own experiences, how long it takes to get that perfect shot, the smile just right, the backdrop just so. We also know that picture portrays a perfectly loving, happy marriage and family, when we know darn well we only smiled for the picture to be taken and went right back to not speaking or yelling at the kids once we got the right shot!

You can not be perfect, “No not one” Take the pressure off yourself. Enjoy those babies, and enjoy this time in your life. It’s the only time you have. There are no “Do-overs” so make the best of your “Right now”.

When life gets hard remember that you have a “Helper” The Holy Spirit living within you to help you and to strengthen you. Psalms 55:22

15 Seconds of Fame

In a time when “Random acts of kindness” seem to be strategically set up, recorded and publicized regularly on social media, and news outlets, we (Christ followers) must know and remember that Gods word says good deeds done in secret are really the ones that count.

Is what you do Gods work? Is it really from the heart? Or are you looking for your 15 seconds of fame?

Matthew 6:1

Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.

Hebrews 13:16

Do not neglect to do good, and to share what you have, for such sacrifices please God