No Do Overs

As always when I talk to my best friend something comes out of our conversation which helps us both. We always seem to lift one another up that way. This time it was our roles as “Help meets” to our husbands and children and how we sometimes resist that calling because we are just tired. We either do too much for our families (spoil them) or we take on too much outside our households which causes imbalance.

In most cases God did not call us to those “other things” but He did call us to be wives, mothers, and nurturers. It’s not always easy, and yes we do allow life to overwhelm us with things which do not matter as much as our families.

I recently heard a report which said that most young mothers are so overwhelmed with motherhood, they have turned to drinking and taking drugs as a way to cope!

I attribute that to trying to have “It All”, careers social lives as well as the pressure that is “Social media perfect”. We all should know from our own experiences (at times) how long it takes to get that perfect shot, the smile just right, the backdrop just so. We also know that picture portrays a perfectly loving, happy marriage and family, when we know darn well we only smiled for the picture to be taken and went right back to not speaking or yelling at the kids!

You can not be perfect, “No not one” Take the pressure off yourself. Enjoy those babies, and enjoy this time in your life. It’s the only time you have. There are no “Do-overs” so make the best your “Right now”.

When life gets hard remember that you have a “Helper” The Holy Spirit living within you to help you and to strengthen you. Psalms 55:22

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Make Time

We make time for who (people) and what (activities) is important to us.

Try not to allow yourself to become so busy or overly exhausted that the very people who you say you love don’t feel it! All they know is you don’t seem to care as much as they care for you! They give their all, never to receive it back from you.

Communication is not just a quick peck on the cheek, a polite “Good morning” or a text message. It’s actually having a real conversation, making time for those you love, making eye contact, giving a real hug, simply showing genuine concern for someone else’s well being!

Make time! Think on it🤔

Fresh or Stale

It is said that some things get better with age (a good wine, a well aged steak etc), but I add, they only get better with proper care, and maintenance. I’m 57 now but even as a young wife, the one thing I vowed would never be okay in my marriage was for us to lose our passion (not love) for one another, and I work very hard at making sure we stay connected. My husband has his way as well, he has always been active in making sure I’m happy and laughing. He is a “Joker”.

It really helps that I had great examples of a healthy relationship, with love, and respect from my parents., Yes! your children are watching and learning how to love and relate from your example.

Example;

I love to dance but my husband doesn’t like to so much (in public), so sometimes when he’s feeling it, he puts on a slow song and reaches for me, and I melt right into his arms. Yesssssss! 😍

I challenge you, think about how you used to get your spouses attention romantically. Why not start doing that (Yes! That!) again. A relationship grows old, stale, and stagnant when proper care is not taken to maintain, and to keep it fresh and vibrant.

Watch out now!

Love, expectance, and tolerance, whether it be learned behavior, practiced or genetic, the struggle is real! It’s not always easy to be good, do good and to walk in line with Gods word!

We are directed to try with all our hearts to love and be at peace with one another! and that includes our spouses. He (the Lord) requires of us to love unconditionally, not “If they do, then I will”. If we say we love God, then we must love one another, PERIOD!!

Proverbs 6:16-19

There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him:

1. haughty eyes (thinks highly of ones self over others)

2. a lying tongue (not completely honest)

3. hands that shed innocent blood (murderer)

4. a heart that devises wicked plans (setting snares/planning wrong)

5. feet that make haste to run to evil (messy/ lovers of confusion)

6. a false witness who breathes out lies (under oath) who sow discord among family

A Recipe for Longevity

I thought this could really help those of you dating or thinking of marriage. These questions were on a morning show I watch and I wanted to share them with you;

*Know who you are, but realize you are ever changing and you need someone willing to evolve with you

*Are you a better person because of them (do they bring out the best in you)

*Are you a balanced couple (religion, children, interests, finance..,). Talk about your differences

*Can you have fun apart (if they only want to be with you and can’t seem to have a life aside from you that may be a red flag)

*Are you a parent or a partner (make sure that you are not getting involved with someone who needs you for unhealthy reasons)

*Do they have your back (are they supportive of you)

Communication is key in all relationships. Just some food for thought 🤔

It’s Time To Make A Change

Friendships are beautiful most of the time but there are some that can be unhealthy;

Have you ever been involved with someone who seems to always keep something going (troublemaker, liar, or even bullies)?

The Bible is our instruction on everything! including how we deal with people in every walk of life.  If someone is a troublemaker, a habitual liar or someone who looks down on others (thinks too highly of themselves), they may be your friend but you have not been able to influence them to behave better-then you should probably not deal with them regularly. The Bible warns that if you are not careful they will end up influencing you instead!

Proverbs 22:24-25 “Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare”

Titus 3:10  “As for a person who stirs up division, after warning them once and then twice, have nothing more to do with them”

Matthew 5:9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God”

Love is Patient and Kind

There seems to be a running theme with people today, It is impatience and intolerance. We don’t seem to be able to contain our anger or frustrations with one another and it’s affecting the lives of our families and friends greatly.

It’s funny though (not ha ha) how we tend to choose who we are patient with (who receives our full wrath) and who we choose to be tolerant with instead of extending  grace to everyone indiscriminately.  Sadly our tolerance is less with our spouses, children and family members and more with strangers 😞.

If we consistently conduct our lives in love, then we show the same love to everyone which our heavenly Father shows toward us daily.

Love is patience, kind, full of joy, showingself control…Galatians 5:22

Proverbs 19:11

Proverbs 22:4

Proverbs 29:11