Tag Archive | communicate

Lesson Learned

This is a recent post from my daughters Facebook post. It’s a long read but well worth the time if you struggle with hearing from God

Warning Signs…

Have you ever seen warning signs about something you really want? You are praying about it and supposedly waiting to hear from God, when you are really hearing from God through the warning signs, but you ain’t trying to hear that, so you keep praying until you hear what you want to hear? Yep, that just happened to me. Let’s just say I should have listened.

I have been wanting to go back to teaching for awhile now. I just want to get my standard certificate and complete that goal that has haunting me since I didn’t choose to complete the teaching program in undergrad. For some reason, every time I have tried it does not work. Moving to TX was another opportunity, so I jumped on it. I enrolled in a certification program, did the coursework and then applied for jobs. Had a few interviews while I was “praying about it”. All of them went well, but nobody called back immediately. 🤔Some friends were asking me why I wanted to go back to work. My only reasons were to put a check mark in the box for “I finally got my standard teaching certification”, and having my “more” money to shop with. Not to change lives, not because teaching is my passion, not because we needed extra income. None of that! So my reason was wrong in the first place. I just wanted to feel like I was doing something, and I wanted more money to play with.

Long story short, a school called (over a month after the interview) and offered me a job. I said hmmm this must be God opening up the door I had already felt He closed and confirmed through several people. But I accepted and soon there after I knew it was wrong. How many of you know that we can cause unessecary pain, stress, you name it, because of disobedience and following our own self-centered ambitions? 🤦🏾‍♀️ I told Jarvis I felt like I was getting a whopping!

Just because something works out, does not always mean it’s God. Well things started falling apart. I was stressed, overwhelmed, mean, and irritable at home. Then everyone we hired to keep the girls before school so that I could work changed their mind or couldn’t do it. Jarvis works a crazy schedule so he and I were not seeing much of each other. He was stretched and stressed working 12hr days 6 days a week, then all of a sudden trying to do the things that I have always done.

I had to take a step back a realize what I was doing to my family because I wanted more. God showed me why the answer has been no, but I had to “touch that hot pot to know it burned”. I had to own up to my mistake, swallow my pride, and walk away from the program and job.

My family is my full-time job, my first priority, and when I try to convince myself that there should be more for me, I am reminded that God has always kept us and given us more than what we need. ” When you are grateful for what you have, what you have becomes enough.” God provides. Do I want to work? Yes, but I want it to work for my family. I want God to direct me (and I listen) in what I do and it not just to be about money. Until that opportunity comes, I will be a happy at home serving my family.

Lesson learned. I hope it helps someone.

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The Good Old Days

It seems as though time is slipping away right before our very eyes. Are you making the most of your time? I believe we try to make time for who and what is important to us or so we think, but can you truly be present (in the moment) with yourcell phone, your iPad or tablet in your face, mindlessly scrolling the internet, through Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest or looking at sports videos and YouTube, Nope!

I remember a simpler time, back when my husband and I had so much contempt for the devices we are now literally “joined at the hip” with. We even talked back then about how “those darn mobile phones” would be the demise of society. The young people were using them in order not to have real interaction, they were a way out of having to deal with people. Now adults are doing the same thing!

We actually peaked into the future, didn’t we!

If this is going to change, we must now be intentional with putting our devices down, making eye contact, saying “Hi”. Your conversation could be the only real and hopefully (positive) interaction a person has today.

Here’s the thing, If you are older, you remember what life was like without a mobile phone, tablets, and all this technology. The world was a much friendlier place, people talked, there was very little internet activity at home (it was at work only) to rob us of hours of our precious time on earth.

Don’t fret! We can get it back! Good old fashioned communication is not totally lost. We just have to be intentional in doing it! Say “Hi” to a stranger, have a conversation in the doctors office, on the elevator, in line waiting for coffee or try this, pick up your phone and call someone instead of texting them!

Let’s go back to the “old time” ways

Colossians 4:5

Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.

Fresh or Stale

It is said that some things get better with age (a good wine, a well aged steak etc), but I add, they only get better with proper care, and maintenance. I’m 57 now but even as a young wife, the one thing I vowed would never be okay in my marriage was for us to lose our passion (not love) for one another, and I work very hard at making sure we stay connected. My husband has his way as well, he has always been active in making sure I’m happy and laughing. He is a “Joker”.

It really helps that I had great examples of a healthy relationship, with love, and respect from my parents., Yes! your children are watching and learning how to love and relate from your example.

Example;

I love to dance but my husband doesn’t like to so much (in public), so sometimes when he’s feeling it, he puts on a slow song and reaches for me, and I melt right into his arms. Yesssssss! 😍

I challenge you, think about how you used to get your spouses attention romantically. Why not start doing that (Yes! That!) again. A relationship grows old, stale, and stagnant when proper care is not taken to maintain, and to keep it fresh and vibrant.

Watch out now!

Love, expectance, and tolerance, whether it be learned behavior, practiced or genetic, the struggle is real! It’s not always easy to be good, do good and to walk in line with Gods word!

We are directed to try with all our hearts to love and be at peace with one another! and that includes our spouses. He (the Lord) requires of us to love unconditionally, not “If they do, then I will”. If we say we love God, then we must love one another, PERIOD!!

Proverbs 6:16-19

There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him:

1. haughty eyes (thinks highly of ones self over others)

2. a lying tongue (not completely honest)

3. hands that shed innocent blood (murderer)

4. a heart that devises wicked plans (setting snares/planning wrong)

5. feet that make haste to run to evil (messy/ lovers of confusion)

6. a false witness who breathes out lies (under oath) who sow discord among family

A Recipe for Longevity

I thought this could really help those of you dating or thinking of marriage. These questions were on a morning show I watch and I wanted to share them with you;

*Know who you are, but realize you are ever changing and you need someone willing to evolve with you

*Are you a better person because of them (do they bring out the best in you)

*Are you a balanced couple (religion, children, interests, finance..,). Talk about your differences

*Can you have fun apart (if they only want to be with you and can’t seem to have a life aside from you that may be a red flag)

*Are you a parent or a partner (make sure that you are not getting involved with someone who needs you for unhealthy reasons)

*Do they have your back (are they supportive of you)

Communication is key in all relationships. Just some food for thought 🤔

Love is Patient and Kind

There seems to be a running theme with people today, It is impatience and intolerance. We don’t seem to be able to contain our anger or frustrations with one another and it’s affecting the lives of our families and friends greatly.

It’s funny though (not ha ha) how we tend to choose who we are patient with (who receives our full wrath) and who we choose to be tolerant with instead of extending  grace to everyone indiscriminately.  Sadly our tolerance is less with our spouses, children and family members and more with strangers 😞.

If we consistently conduct our lives in love, then we show the same love to everyone which our heavenly Father shows toward us daily.

Love is patience, kind, full of joy, showingself control…Galatians 5:22

Proverbs 19:11

Proverbs 22:4

Proverbs 29:11

No More Excuses

Change is tough for us, it is emotionally challenging. it is not what we are used to doing, what we are used to saying, or who we are used to being.  That’s why it’s so hard to change.

Now, It is said that in order to make change a habit, you must do whatever it is for at least 21 days consecutively. It is also said that if we make a change in one area of our lives, (yes, that), it can theoretically affect change in all areas of our lives.

If you know you want to be better, you want to behave better or you want to look better but you can’t quite seem to make it happen on your own, why not ask God to be your strength, or to be your voice of reason, and then you do your part and begin to make an effort and don’t stop trying! If you fail,

No more excuses! You can do it!

Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”.

Matthew 6:33 says, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these other things shall be added”, (Righteous things, Godly blessings), nothing is too big, too small or too hard for God!  Just ask Him, He is able and He will change what you cannot change on your own.