Tag Archive | husbands

Marriage is Give & Take

Marriage is one of the most important relationships you will ever have, and the best advice I can give is, don’t be selfish! If you know you are bad with money and even though they do things differently from you, they seem to have a better relationship with finances than you do, give up the power!! Hand over the responsibility of bill paying, spending, and saving, and be willing to take good advice from your “better half“, cause they got it going on in that department !!

I know of what I speak because I did it, and things got so much better once I saw things my husbands way, (He’s gonna love this post!). We got so good at managing our finances that we are now debt free!! I’m not bragging, I’m just trying to help someone. I’m so glad I stopped being selfish and put into practice my husbands (vision) way of doing things because we still love each other and we are living the life God promised us!

If you recognize yourself in this post, don’t be so stubborn that you continue in the wrong direction just to spite your spouse and yourself! Be flexible and be honest concerning your weaknesses and flaws. Things can and most likely will change with your cooperation.

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God ​— ​who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly ​— ​and it will be given to him. —James 1:5


Have You Changed Your Mind?

 I remember as a child how when Mohamed Ali was interviewed before or after a fight, he would always say, “I am the greatest”, “I float like a butterfly, and sting like a bee”. He spoke that which he expected his life to be, and based on his boxing career, he succeeded just as he spoke and, as he expected. He was referred to as arrogant and conceited, but he WAS the greatest boxer in his day, because he spoke victory, never defeat over his own life and, most importantly he was about helping others.

It’s what we expect, that which we think about which expands in our lives. Change your thoughts, then you will change your world. Change your expectations, then your life can start to manifest that which you speak and believe. 

Proverbs 18:21. Death and life are in the power of the tongue

Proverbs 23:7 For as a man thinketh, so is he

John 10:10 “I have come that you may have life and have it more abundantly”

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”.

Let it All Hang Out

Times are so very different now than when my husband and I were dating, it makes me a little sad.   People hide behind lies or surface conversations, and you never seem to get below thier surface.  You meet online,  you text instead of talk.  Communication is vital, and face to face conversations allow you to see, instead of assume someone’s emotion from a txt msg.  Phone calls allow you to hear emotion as well.  Don’t allow someone who only wants to text, to get close to you. Their either not really serious or they have something to hide.

For your own good, take time to get to really know a person before you allow yourself to fall for someone you may think you know.    Don’t be afraid to ask questions you need answers to for fear of upsetting someone, that’s if you are dating for the purpose of finding a life long mate (marriage).  Involve God in your relationship, ask Him to show you all things that may be hidden, and then “watch as well as pray”.   As for yourself, “Let it all hang out”,  all of who you are, and see if they can handle the real you, especially if you know you have unresolved issues, issues that may have even ruined a promising relationship in the past (some things come only by prayer and fasting).  

What I am saying is, don’t be a deceiver and don’t allow yourself to be deceived.  The truth is always better than a lie.  So go ahead, and let them get to know who you really are!   And ask God to show you who they really are as well, after all,  the person meant for you can handle almost everything about you until,  even if a change ever takes place.  They could even be the reason you finally begin to want to work things out within yourself!

Proverbs 12:22 ESV   Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are his delight.
Proverbs 10:9 ESV  Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.

One word


As I watch the beginning of political conferences,   political debates, and the news concerning the killing of innocent people,   I understand why so many seem to be losing hope concerning the state of our nation and yes,  even our world.  

I’ve come to encourage you, don’t get down about what’s going on in our nation, and in politics right now.  Whatever you do, just don’t be a part of the spreading of the hate.  

Gods word declares that we (Christ followers) are to be “peace keepers”.   So even though you may not understand,  trust God and turn everything over to Him in prayer.  Your pain, your heart break,  your hurt,  even your hate,  and your inability to understand just how all this could be happening in the 21st century etc.

There is absolutely nothing that happens in the universe that is outside of God’s influence and authority. As King of kings and Lord of lords, God has no limitations. 

2 Chronicles 7:14

If My people which are called My name will humble themselves,  pray, seek My face and turn from their wicked ways,  then will I hear from Heaven.  I will forgive their sins and I will heal their land.

Build your man up

No man appreciates constant criticism.   We are created in the image of God, (Genesis), and our God desires our  Praise!  Praise for being our Heavenly father, the creator of the universe.   Praise for giving us Jesus Christ.

Now,  If we are made as He is,  it stands to reason that we too love to be praised for what we do,  just as our Creator does!!

Ladies,  just as we appreciate being told we look nice,  we are good mother’s, we are good wives and so on, we should be praising the men in our lives for what they do well, especially if they don’t  help out as much as we would like.  You know,  those things like helping with housework, dinner, and the kids.   Tell them how they make you feel protected and cared for.  Don’t forget to ell them how handsome they are.  In other words, tell them they are “The best thing since sliced bread”, as my mother used to say.    Stroke that ego,  brag on them,  build them up,  don’t tear them down. 

Now to those of you who doubt this could change anything, think about how you feel when you are complemented at work for a job well done, or when you are complemented in general.  If it motivates you,  it could motivate him to do better,  to do more,  but you will never know unless you give it a try, and not just once or twice but be persistent and consistent for a couple of weeks.  I think you will be surprised, at least I pray that you will.

Father’s day is tomorrow.  Make his day special.


We cannot walk away from this crisis.

Let me first say,  this has nothing to do with hate but everything to do with the safety of our children and their future.  If we don’t take a bold stand, Christian voices will be silenced

May 13, 2016

Protect Our Children!

The Obama administration is ramping up its efforts to force public schools to allow students to use the restroom and locker rooms of the opposite sex. Boys who are clearly boys would be free to use the girls’ facilities and vice versa.

And if parents and students object? They are either ignored or vilified as bigots.

It’s all part of the U.S. Department of Education’s “Title IX Mandates” (Title IX is part of the U.S. Education Code governing federal rules for education).

These rules have been revised to provide special protections for “transgenderism” — boys or men who perceive on any given day they identify as a female, or women and girls who perceive they are male.

Schools that do not comply risk losing federal funding and may even be prosecuted by the Justice Department, which has also redefined sex discrimination to include sexual orientation and “gender identity” (the new term for males who think they are females and vice versa).

FRC has a plan to counteract this outrage, and you are part of it. But first, let me explain why public school restrooms have become “Ground Zero” in the effort to destroy Christian morality, religious freedom, and the next generation, using “gender identity” as a weapon.

Let’s answer some of the most pressing questions I am often asked:

QUESTION: “Why is the Obama administration trying to mainstream ‘transgenderism’ and force schools to accommodate students who want to use the bathrooms and locker rooms of the opposite sex?

ANSWER: It’s all part of a radical movement trying to destroy the fact that God created man and woman — and that somehow people can choose what gender they want to be. The ultimate goal is to break down all sexual inhibition and morality — a goal that would result in social chaos.

And the only way they can pull off this scheme? Big government.

Think of it. If government can force the “normalization” or even the celebration of something as universally unnatural as men using women’s restrooms and vice versa, then it can force the rest of its agenda on the American people very easily.

And consider this, if the White House can dictate the bathroom policies of the nation, then what is beyond its reach? The answer is absolutely nothing.

QUESTION: “Do you think that the ultimate goal is to destroy the impact of Christianity in our country?”

ANSWER: Definitely, yes.

Christianity is a hindrance to what the secularists in the Obama administration and “Progressive” special interest groups ultimately want to do.

QUESTION: “The federal government . . . state governments . . . municipalities . . . even corporations and pro sports teams seem to be pushing special rights based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Can we really turn back the tide?”

ANSWER: Yes! We can and will if we have the courage to take a stand and call this foolishness what it is. But we are at a point where Christians have to lose their fear of what other people say — or do.

That’s exactly what North Carolina Governor Pat McCrory (R) is doing. When his state chose to protect women, children, and others by repealing a Charlotte ordinance that would have punished businesses that designate restrooms for men only and women only, Obama’s Department of Justice sent a letter threatening action against North Carolina. On Monday, Governor McCrory decided to respond by going on the offensive suing the government for the administration’s overreach.

By God’s grace and your support, we can win.

In Washington, D.C., FRC is educating conservatives in Congress to help them understand and effectively address the social issues that are the root cause of America’s moral slide. At the top of our agenda is federal legislation that defends the First Amendment rights of Christians who, for reasons of faith, cannot affirm same-sex marriage and need protection from government persecution.

FRC is also voicing opposition to the U.S. Department of Education’s redefinition of sexual discrimination to include transgenderism. We give people across the country the assurance that it is NOT bigoted to stand up for the biological truth that a man is a man and a woman is a woman.

By arming leaders and everyday Americans with the facts, FRC provides the backbone Christians need to make a difference. It is simply not enough to curse the darkness. We need to drive darkness away with the light of compelling truth — well-researched facts and irrefutable arguments.

But we must act quickly and decisively. Without the necessary financial resources, FRC will not be able to meet the many challenges ahead. I am counting on you to come through at this most critical time for our country.

Please send as generous a contribution as you can. Our team of experts will put your funds to immediate use in every way I outlined above.

Thank you in advance for your generous gift as we face this most critical struggle.

Standing (Ephesians 6:13),

Tony Perkins

P.S. One more urgent matter: FRC’s fiscal year ends on June 30. We must receive an additional $3 million by that date to meet our budget. Please consider giving extra this month to help us reach this important financial goal. Thank you!

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The “Real” deal

I was watching my favorite morning show when Toni Tennille of the 70’s & 80’s singing duo Captain and Tennille was on the show talking about what we now know was a very unhappy marriage.  The problem was that for the sake of their careers and from the public perception everything seemed fine, they seemed to be happily married!
She recently wrote a book telling how and why the relationship is now over.  She writes that they were married because her mother and their agent wanted it especially after they had a child together, so they did it.  She tells how she was a very happy and affectionate person but her husband was not because of his difficult childhood.  The thing is, she knew this before she said “I do”!  Big mistake!  As I have said many times, people are generally who they are when you meet them.  You can’t change the fabric of who a person truly is.  They are who they are and not likely to change, no matter how hard they may try.  Only God can change us and that is only when we acknowledge we are broken or we recognize we have a problem.

I’m pretty sure I have told you guys before that even in my happy marriage, my husband and I revisit some of the same issues every 6 months or so like clock work, and that’s okay,  that’s how we function because we are very different people.  I love him so much because he has always been willing to work on those things which don’t come as naturally to him as they do to me (affection and social activity).

The moral of this story is, if you are making excuses for them constantly, take the blinders off!   If you are in a relationship with someone who has ways that drive you up a wall or you says things like, “I think they are great” but…  Don’t look over those problems or issues because after they hurt you, you have “great make up sex” (a no no as a Christian anyway), or “they are so good looking” (we look so great together), please don’t be this shallow concerning your life. 

Weigh the pros (happiness, joy) against the cons (unhappiness, pain, disfunction) before you take the leap into what “should be “a life long relationship together, and above all don’t be desperate, don’t allow yourself to be deceived for the sake of having a relationship.

Life is tough enough, but life with someone who is not concerned about your overall happiness and well-being as much as they are with their own,  would be very unhappy and evermore sad knowing you saw all the signs before you committed to it..

Go into every relationship with your eyes wide open.  Ask God to show you those things which you can not see about or in them for yourself.  Ask God to show you all things that may be hidden from you on purpose! If you are honest with yourself, we all know how to put the best of us on display in order to get what we want, don’t we?

Proverbs 12:22
Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are his delight.

John 8:32
You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free