Marriage requires a certain level of maturity as well as a lot of self control. It has not always been present in my marriage but it is what has kept us together for all these years. Once we both learned to choose our battles and not wear our feelings on our shirt sleeve, things got much easier . Now don’t get me wrong, real process takes some of us longer than others and to be honest, we may never really master it but if we get the basic premise of love and unselfish behavior down, life tends to change dramatically.
One of my local gospel personalities said, “Pride makes excuses but maturity makes adjustments”. Oh my goodness! How many times have you made an excuse for behaving badly towards one another? Well, maturity keeps you working at doing what is right, and less likely responding in anger, and definitely not intentionally being hurtful. Here’s the thing, we can not sustain change without Gods help and strength to working in us, no matter how badly we really want to, it’s hard and we must always check our motives for the change. Now ask yourself, “Have I asked God to help me to change for me? “Do I really even want to change” then once you identify your reason for wanting change, go to your Heavenly Father, ask Him to help you with the process, ask Him to help you to love one another just as He loves us, unconditionally. Now all you have to do is start behaving in love as you continue to pray for Gods help to sustain the change in you.
Remember, you may fail a few times before you get it, but “Practice makes perfect“ and you will know when you have matured beyond your own ability because you will start to give more of yourself than you may be receiving without much effort at all, you may walk away from confrontations instead of speaking in anger, and most things that angered you in the past may even become comical because The Holy Spirit will help you to see how childish some reactions really are.
“Love (charity) starts at home and then spreads abroad”