I’m Thinking Out Loud

This  is an old post,  but it means alot to me as we celebrate our 35th wedding anniversary today.  It’s worth repeating!

I know I’ve said it before,  but it bears repeating; ” No one person stays the same”,  especially in marriage and relationships.  As wonderful as my husbands is,  I have often wished for those honeymoon days again  but marriage, career, children, sickness, and life has changed us.   It just happens. 

“We live our lives in phases”.  In order to make sure these changes, phases or seasons don’t derail or in some cases destroy your relationship.   Try making home a “stress free zone” as much as possible. Check in emotionally with one another regularly.  Don’t assume everything is fine, we are pros at deception and will tell ourselves “things are fine” or in some cases we may even say “they know me,  they understand me”.  That will never work, instead be purposeful about  spending quality time together,  build one another up during those tough times, share your feelings (good, bad, and indifferent) share your experiences, your faults and your failures but be careful not to use your spouse as your own personal “dumping ground” in the process.

I had to express this very thing to my husband not too long ago.   I was so tired of him coming home everyday complaining about the same thing.  Did I mention it was everyday for weeks ?   His response to me was,  ” If I can’t talk to you,  then who can I talk to”? The “talking” wasn’t  the problem, it was the content of the conversation, (I love hearing about his day normally), but no one wants to hear anyone complain, brag about or vent about the same thing, all the time!. The thing is, he didn’t even realize that he was doing it until it was brought to his attention.  He does now! 

Life gets hard and years pass but he or she is still the person you fell in love with.   Ask God to help you find those qualities you fell in love with.

If you get a chance sometime soon, go online and listen to Ed Sheerans song, “Thinking out loud” .  It is one of those songs that helps to remind you of what you love about one another.

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