“Submissive” Why is it such a dirty word

I had a moment this morning, and I decided I should revisit this subject from my first few months of blogging 2014. It’s aways relevant

“Why is today’s woman too much of an independent, intelligent and strong woman to be a willing subject in a marriage “submissive” Is it because we have been led to believe that being submissive is being a sexual object or a slave to man and not having your own will or opinions. The word submissive is simple when you are in the relationship for all the right reasons, love and respect come easily then. Marriage is a union between a man and a woman (Yes) not ownership of another being. If a man loves a woman then she is who he desires to please and provide for as much as he is able, and in return she should to want to please him in more ways than just sexually. He should not have to ask her to keep the house clean or prepare a meal if that’s what she knows he desires? It also means you look to one another for pleasure as well as support.

Be mindful as Christians that we look to Christ for help when we need it. St. John 15:5 b. “Apart from Me, you can do nothing”. The Living Word for Living Life/Gods Path to Success in Every Situation says; Out of respect for Christ be courteously reverent to one another”. Wives understand and support your husbands in ways that show your love for Christ. The Husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does for the church, not domineering but by cherishing, So just as the church submits to Christ as he is exercising such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands. Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives exactly how Christ did with a love that is giving Not getting. Everything He does and says should be designed to bring the best out of her”. 1 Peter 1:22 NLT version says , The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs (emotional as well as physical). There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of Holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance- styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes- but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. Proverbs 21:21. He who earnestly seeks after and craves righteousness, mercy and loving kindness will find life in addition to righteousness (right standing with God) and honor. If your profess God, you must live God all the time so that when issues arise (and they will) your prayers may be answered 1 Peter 3:7. “Likewise husbands , live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the of the Grace of life, so that your prayers not be hindered” Yes!

There are those who made or are making a decision to be with someone for all the wrong reasons, lust, financial stability, status, family etc., Be careful what you do out of selfish desire at any cost. Those kinds of relationships come with a price and rarely last. You may get the family, social status, and/or financial stability however; you might also be miserable because you didn’t seek after real love, Godly love, the kind of love which brings with it all you need to weather any storm together. Mathew 6:33 “But seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be added”.

Marriage isn’t that difficult, It’s commitment, and takes time to learn what works and doesn’t work for each of you but it is so much easier when you love as you want to be loved. 1Peter 4:8 “Love covers a multitude of sin” ( forgives and disregards the offenses of others)


11 thoughts on ““Submissive” Why is it such a dirty word

  1. As with many things, ignorance gets in the way of the truth. So many people base their beliefs on the perceptions of others in order to conform. D/s, more or less, was a completely normal way of life in society… until the previous 75 years.

  2. I enjoyed this article. I had been looking for advice on relationships since i’m in a relationship now and was just turned off from dating for so long. Glad yo be back on the horse! Thank you for this

  3. “Is it because we have been led to believe that being submissive is being a sexual object or a slave to man and not having your own will or opinions”.
    The above has nothing to do with being submissive, am afraid it seems you have got it a little wrong. Let’s rectify: it’s NOT what you do, but who you are. It is also NOT about sex, rather the mind and dynamics two are able and willing to establish so to push each other’s boundaries and discover more about themselves, together. It’s in your nature to seek the dominance of another, as it’s in a dominant nature to seek power. In D/s relationship a submissive is not a slave, s/he has a choice and ultimately the power to make all happen. A slave instead is someone whom has chosen to NOT have a choice. D/s is a journey of discovery of oneself. The bond between Master/Mistress and sub is one form and based solely on deep trust, care, mutual fulfilment. No Dom/Domme would find fulfilling or pleasurable to have someone doing as they told, unless they themselves find pleasure in doing it. This misconception of D/s linked to sexual reasons makes it difficult for many to understand what truly is about. Readings prove useful and prove that such type of relationship goes far beyond the physical satisfaction, it actually aims at finding a mental and emotional one, caring for the nature of each party.

    • Hi, I’m sorry you feel the way you do concerning what you think submissiveness is and My Post, but it is my opinion and mine only! I will say this to you, God made us all and he didn’t make anyone to be enslaved by another in relationship or marriage (master or mistress). What you have been led to believe is not what the bible says. It says to love one another, love has nothing to do with domineering), for a man to HONOR his wife as the weaker vessel, and to love her as Christ loved the church (Christ never forced Himself on anyone) and gave His life for her. It is by this, that you will want to give yourself to your mate, to do the things that please him because he is loving, caring, giving to you and genuinely concerned for your happiness. Giving yourself does not always equate to sex, it’s your heart, your support, your emotions etc. it’s the whole you, not just your body. If a man is doing all he can for you, you would want to please him and keep him happy. We live in a world which is carnal (evil) and even the most beautiful bond between a man and a woman has been tarnished. I’m sorry for your negative life experiences but I pray you find the type of love that will allow you to want to give your WHOLE self freely and not be made to feel like your an object. God bless

      • You didn’t read: if it’s MY wish to “act” as such, then where the enslavement is? What part of consensual you don’t understand in the equation that involves D/s? It is same as in a marriage: do you do all you wish, without ever asking permission to your husband? Do you consider him to be a sort of friend, there to accompany you in life, but not to ask of you a thing? And if so, why? Isn’t it clearly stated in the Bible, that a woman should submit – mind, the word submission comes back here! – to your husband? So why you twist that teaching – a dogma to be taken seriously, given it came from God through Christ to us – so to suit YOUR wishes? And since when (please make light) in the eyes of the Lord men have the right to judge others?? I don’t think you are taking your dogmas as seriously as you should; nor do many of the Christians preaching and forgetting to abide our Lord’s rules (!), first and foremost the one about judging others, to continue with the woman submission to her husband and going on with the love one another (NO distinctions made by Him about WHO the others have to be in order to be loved).
        Instead of worrying about what consensually a submissive woman gives of herself to her man, I suggest you ponder what truly you are doing of what Christ has taught us all about being in God’s grace.

  4. PS: before engaging into debates about a subject, one should gain knowledge about it. Clearly you don’t have it, whilst I am a Christian and can related to the same teachings you are now twisting to befit your personal – wrong – views about other’s and their relationship. God didn’t give you a right to judge and demean other’s or their choices. He will take care of them, in a more compassionate, understanding, free of prejudice way, for He loves us all as we are.

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